Dancing with Jesus!!!

HELLO!

 I feel like its been forever since I have updated on my life! haha before I say anything I just want to say thank you for the sweet messages I have received through email!! You guys are so sweet!!! (you know who you are!)thank you so much for the LOVEEEE!!!

 so last time I updated I wanted to become a fitness specialist!! But GOD had a different plan for me. hahaha I ended up not being able to get any classes this semester and INSTEAD I got a job teaching more dance classes and I have ALSO been taking dance classes!!! Its been so fun but so hard!!! I have been learning about how awesome it is to LEARN!!! haha The new studio gave me 7 classes to teach! Some classes I haven't even had experience in teaching before but my boss gave them to me anyways and told me she believed in me. It was so sweet and immediately I knew that God was up to something amazing, and even though I had no idea what I was going to do, I knew I just needed to trust that He would teach me!! Here I am with Nerve damage in my head and a tired, frail, body and I'm teaching tons of dance classes.. WOW GOD. just wow. This is 100% completely HIM and HIS LOVE. I go in there feeling so inadequate and all I do is ASK GOD to do it for me and to be my strength and my JOY and all the sudden I am thinking of all these things to teach and the students are having a blast and AHHH!!! ITS ALL HIM!!! There is no way that this could be me. No way! On top of all that amazing love from God... I get to encourage these kids to keep going, even when its hard. I was having my 3 year old class hop on one foot, and one of my girls looked at me and said "teacher!!! I cant do it!!! its too hard!!!" and I came to her, got down on her level, and told her "You can do it, sweet princess! I'm going to help you!" and I took her hands and helped her across as she smiled ear to ear!!..
 THIS brought tears to my eyes in the moment.. because.. I just saw Jesus in this. IT WAS NOT ME. IT WAS HIM. I know it might sound weird that I am pointing out how I see Jesus working through me.. but I'm going to do it anyways because HE encouraged me so much! I realized in that moment that we are never ever ever in this alone... Jesus is here.. and He takes our hands.. and He helps us. we are NEVER IN THIS ALONE. How BEAUTIFUL is His love!!!

 In the dance classes I am taking.. every second I feel way to exhausted to continue.. but I remind myself "I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me." and somehow.. I press on. and I see that ITS NOT ME.. its Him. On Sunday I was going to dance hula in this outreach luau, but when I got there my head was hurting so much that I couldn't walk and I hadn't been able to eat anything all day.. and everything inside of me was saying "just give up and go home. you can't do it." and right then I had a sweet girl come up to me and tell me that I inspire her through my head pain! and that she was thankful for me! WHAT?!?! Here I am ready to give up and God says "be still, sweet daughter, I am using you." but still I felt like there was no way I was going to get up on that stage.. and just then I had ANOTHER girl come up to me and ask me how I was.. I told her that I wasn't doing good and I didn't think I was going to be able to dance. and she said "If God brought you here, He will dance for you up there!" HOW COULD I FORGET THIS?!?! How could I forget His faithfulness in my life! That He ALWAYS comes through. Right then I was reminded that He who is IN me is stronger that he who is in the world. So I put a smile on my face and prayed my heart out and Jesus danced through me on that stage. I am so humbled and AMAZED to see God so vividly and HUGE in my life and all around me! thank You JESUS!!!!

I need Him so much! all the time. each day. every second. Jesus... Jesus.. Jesus. I want to be wholeheartedly surrendered and devoted to HIM! Right now I feel like nothing else matters but Him!!! TAKE THIS WORLD AND GIVE ME JESUS!!!! I just want Him!!! The deeper I go into this valley of pain the DEEPER I get to know His heart and HIS LOVE! The more I have to do that I feel like I can't handle.. the more HE COMES THROUGH! Thank You Jesus! I am so messed up and so small and such a sinner and in every way consumed with myself, thinking this life is about me and I am so quick to forget His LOVE! BUT He has SAVED ME and called me His and washed away all of the mess and has a plan for me and loves me loves me loves me! I do not deserve this!!! WHAT A GIFT!!!! I cant even type! I cant even get out my thoughts in a way that makes sense! because it just doesn't make sense!!!!! His love is so far beyond comprehension! I am so blessed to know Him! I am just absolutely NOTHING! He is EVERYTHING! I feel so LAME to even update this blog about whats going on in my life because I feel like the whole post should be full of JUST JESUS JESUS JESUS! because that's all I need.. and that's all you need.

 Thank You God, That You know.. That you understand.. that you LOVE.. that you are stronger than head aches and STRONGER than my weak body.. and more powerful than the enemy that tells me I can't do it!!! Even though this trial is so hard, I see the streams of mercy that never cease that come from YOUR heart and YOUR LOVE! ahhhh! I don't even know what I'm saying!!! I'm just going to post this and pray that God uses it somehow to encourage you!

 "But we have this treasure in jars of clay to show that this all-surpassing power is from God and not from us. We are hard pressed on every side, but not crushed; perplexed, but not in despair; persecuted, but not abandoned; struck down, but not destroyed."- 2 Corinthians 4:7-9

 JESUS YOU ARE ENOUGH.